When Faith and Fear Collide

My life recently has felt overwhelming.  So many health issues to address, not only for me but also for my husband.  I'm certain that all of us go through similar feelings especially in their older years.  My faith is not lacking that Jesus is taking care of it all I'm just really feeling "buried beneath", which is a song that I love by the band Red.  The world can so easily bury us, if we let it.

And so I've kept seeking and in my mind was this song and another, 

They were playing on top of each other in my head.  They would not go away.  And as so many other times, when a song plays over and over for days that means that God is attempting to tell me something through the lyrics in that song.  Although sometimes I'm a bit dense about it and only reading the lyrics doesn't work.

After all of my appointments were over for the week I was able to relax.

On Saturday morning I got online to look up something for a collage in my new ESV Interleaved Journaling Bible.  It just came to mind to look for Jesus walking on the water.  Jesus Walking on Water  and the tears started to come.  The image that impressed me the most was:

http://rickberrystudio.com/Painting Credit

And by this time I was bawling.  I've continued working in my interleaved Bible yet I wasn't sure where this was going.  I knew I could use this image as long as it was just for me, for teaching, etc... and I will always give an artist credit.  I started working on this page today and immediately as soon as I started this Bible Journaling page, these words from a favorite song came to mind that the Lord has used in my life several times before "When Faith and Fear Collide".  

 And I finally got it.  Why does God take me on such a journey to figure something out like this?  Because I will remember it.  This is the first song by Skillet that ever meant anything much to me.

My Bible Journaling - It didn't take me long to figure out what Jesus wanted to reveal to me.  I was having fear about moving forward mostly due to the unknown...and I just needed to take His hand!

 I'm so excited to have my new and very economical ESV Interleaved Journaling Bible.  It gives me so much more space to spread out and do my own artwork, etc...

I made some of my own tabs with a punch or note paper and found various pre-made tabs in my journaling supplies.

I added a pretty colorful book cover that I already had.  The black strap is a headband (I purchased a pack of 3 for my head but they did not fit and to my surprise I've used them all, already to hold various things closed).  I made the page markers for a fourth time from instructions on a YouTube video:



Although I wrapped mine with Washi tape instead of scrapbook paper.

Time for the Bible Garden to start!

ay God bless you through my writing. If He has especially touched you in any way, please leave a comment below. Your comments are so very encouraging to me to help me to keep writing. Also, click on the “Up-tweet” button on the above right and share! I pray you will keep coming back. I fully believe that my writing is by the inspiration of the Holy Spirit so if I am writing, there is someone that needs to read it! Maybe it’s you? Also, please be sure to share any questions you might have with me and if you would like to keep them personal (just between you and me) please don’t hesitate to e-mail me at juliana.pace@gmail.com. If I don’t know how to answer you, I will may every attempt to refer you to someone for more information. Thanks and may God bless all your days!

ARE YOU TURNING YOUR NOSE UP TO CHURCH?

Are you sure that you know why?  If you think church is the same as it was even 30 years ago, then you need to find out what you’re missing!

(I finally just got settled down to write.  My husband changed hours and I’m just now getting more used to the much, much different time schedule.  He works nights and with driving he is gone for 14 hours yet just 3-4 days per week!  We are praising God and know that this gift in his new job comes from none other than our Papa God!  It is more than either of us could imagine, which is actually quite normal for our Papa!

*Luke 11:13 “If you then, being evil, know how to give good gifts to your children, how much more will your heavenly Father give the Holy Spirit to those who ask Him!”

So, I am still at work, one day at a time, to reorganize my hours so that I can do most of my work while he is gone except for some that I need his help with.  I’m learning to go to bed earlier and get up earlier which also seems to suit my own system for some reason.  And, I think in the long run it will become quite conducive of writing, too, since I love to write in the wee hours of the night.  I’m working toward mostly being up by 5am (so I can also exercise) but will get up a bit earlier when writing.  It’s so quiet with the world mostly asleep yet in my home with just me here I can turn on my worship music, softly, to make a good environment for my writing with the Holy Spirit as my inspiration).

Earlier today I went out to run errands.  I do so much writing while out driving in my car, enjoying the sunshine and normally listening to Christian music.  The kind of music I listen to depends on my mood.  When I’m awake and alert I normally listen to people like Jesus Culture, Kari Jobe and similar but when I need empowered or even just woken up, it’s Red, Thousand Food Krutch, Kutless, Skillet and various others.  Today I was feeling like getting out of the house, being young and energetic,  and cranking my music.  I was a teenager in the 70’s so for some reason it’s stuck even into my 55^th year.  As I listened to one of my favorite tunes by Thousand Foot Krutch:

 

I thought how wrong I was and how I am surprised by the response of the world (comments on YouTube).  Before I rededicated my life to the Lord in 1988, I thought being a Christian must be boring, hum drum, blah blah blah…was I ever wrong.  Here I am 26+ years into living for/with Jesus and I believe I’m bolder, more alive, freer, and happier than I ever was in my youth (Youth?).  Yes, there wasn’t the Christian music of today in the 70’s & 80’s when I would consider myself being “youth” & “young adult” aged.  But, that’s not all.  There is a fire deep inside that has a need of being fed. 

 If you still think that being a Christian must be boring, hum drum, lack luster, then you truly need to become educated.  I always, always keep myself educated and open about the world, as much as possible, so that if someone asks me about something I can tell them with total honestly, my opinion.  So, why not become educated about your ideas on faith, if they are antiquated?  You may be surprised by what you find!  And, if you are hurting deep down, you may also be surprised by the peace, the comfort, the love that you find that is made to suit just you!  Yes, He gives us all what we need!

*Philippians 4:19  “And my God shall supply all your need according to His riches in glory by Christ Jesus.”

 

And, I, as I am not perfect need to continually remind myself that that “need” is not merely financial/monetary but “ALL” of our needs!  If you do not feel that your needs are being met, come to Jesus and tell Him so!  Honestly, if you are clueless about where to start just tell Him so!  Prayer is just talking to God! 

*James 1:5 “If any of you lacks wisdom, let him ask of God, who gives to all liberally and without reproach, and it will be given to him.”

 

and

*Proverbs 3:5-6

Trust in the Lord with all your heart,
And lean not on your own understanding;
In all your ways acknowledge Him,
And He shall direct your paths.

If you want to give Him your heart right now, it’s so easy by sincerely repeating this simple prayer.

Dear Jesus,

I want to know more of You.  I want to turn away from this life that is just hurting and confusing me and come into a life with You.  I believe that You died for my sins and want to live in a relationship with me forever!  Show me Who You are and how I may live with You at the helm of my life!

In Jesus’ name,

Amen