One Healing Amongst Many – 2011 + UPDATE 2013

Thanks to the Lord I have been healed of much.  I truly have trouble hearing people putting limits on what God can do because I know I was saved at 13 but had no clue as to His un-limitless power until I was arrested for selling LSD at 28 and I rededicated my life to Him. I had no doubts that I was a Christian with a Christian upbringing but there was so much concentration on ritual and condemnation and not on God’s love, God’s power, God’s mercy, etc.   I’ve shared about finding this scripture: 

 

*Romans 2:4 “Or do you despise the riches of His goodness, forbearance, and longsuffering, not knowing that the goodness of God leads you to repentance?”

Over and over again He has healed me mentally, physically, emotionally, spiritually and of which so much has happened that I’m not quite sure where to start. It would take much more time to write than I have time to do, that’s for sure. He has healed me from old hurtful memories, lesions in my brain, epilepsy, and every month or two I find some other malady that has left me!  He is forever at work restoring to me the years that the locusts ate 

 

*Joel 2:25a “And I will restore to you the years that the locust hath eaten,” 

 

But, I do believe I am to share about the His healing from fear of which I had many 

 

*1 John 4:18 “There is no fear in love; but perfect love casts out fear, because fear involves torment. But he who fears has not been made perfect in love.”

 

I had so very much fear in my life that once again, I hardly know where to start. I know that I had several that had been manifested as actual phobias to the point where I was at a meeting for Christian artists and when we went around the room and had to just give our names and a little about ourselves my heart thumped loudly and as it was my turn, my view of the room changed to fog and faces flying at me out of this fog.  This happened just a few years ago even after our move to Florida and I was unsure about what to do about it.  That was a horrifying experience for me that nearly led me to believe that I had some kind of mental disorder (not that God couldn’t heal me anyway but it was that awful).

I had a fear of speaking in front of people for as long as I could remember.  When I prayed as a child (4-5 or so years old) I was chastised for not doing it right which is where I believe this whole fear started. A child should never be chastised for not praying right but:

 

*Ephesians 6:4 “And you, fathers, do not provoke your children to wrath, but bring them up in the training and admonition of the Lord."

Not long after this experience with the other artists, I was prayed for at church.  

The following day it came time to bless our lunch and I quickly offered to say the prayer with no fear involved whatsoever and I noticed a big difference in how I felt.

It wasn’t until a few months or even a year or later (May, 2009) that I noticed a other differences.  I’d had a tremendous fear of heights since I was a child and nearly had a fatal fall.  This day we were at an amusement park on the sky ride and I looked down and instead of seeing the ground swimming and awkward beneath us, I SAW THE ACTUAL GROUND!  I remarked over and over about this as it’d been a good 40 years since I’d been higher up and looked down seeing the ground with any kind of normalcy!  I also rode rides along with a couple of larger roller coasters that day!

After sharing the fact that I was riding roller coasters with our pastor he asked me if I would give a testimony to that fact in church.  It took me a little work to get up the gumption to doing it. I realized that *“I can do all things through Christ who strengthens me” Phil. 4:13 and went ahead with setting it up for Father’s day of that year.  And, I DID IT!  I got up in front of our entire congregation on Sunday morning and I had another showing of God’s healing power in my life.  I looked out into that congregation and saw many people smiling back at me.  I saw the people instead of heads flying at me!  HALLELUJAH & PRAISE THE LORD!

And, I have spoken in front of the congregation a couple of times since that day! I continue to move forward on a daily basis with the Lord!  He is the strength of my life.  I know that with Him, all that He places before me, I can do because of:

*Mark 9:23 “Jesus said to him, “If you can believe, all things are possible to him who believes.”

*Mark 10:27 “But Jesus looked at them and said, “With men it is impossible, but not with God; for with God all things are possible.””

   

UPDATE 2013:  I am still learning & growing without fear!  I continually thank and praise the Lord with each new place that I visit alone (which I never did growing up or even as an adult).  And, it gets easier and easier.  I believe that God showed me that I am healed of fear and now it’s up to me to believe it and step out in FAITH with God!  I can do all things!

    And, I just believe that I’m supposed to share one of my favorite songs with you today…please enjoy this video:



May God bless you through my writing. If He has especially touched you in any way, please leave a comment below. Your comments are so very encouraging to me to help me to keep writing. I pray you will keep coming back. I fully believe that my writing is by the inspiration of the Holy Spirit so if I am writing, there is someone that needs to read it! Maybe it’s you? Also, please be sure to share any questions you might have with me and if you would like to keep them personal (just between you and me) please don’t hesitate to e-mail me at juliana.pace@gmail.com. If I don’t know how to answer you, I will may every attempt to refer you to someone for more information. Thanks and may God bless all your days!

Finding His Goodness

I continue to be woken up nearly every day with this song going through my mind:

Not Alone
Until We Have Faces
by Red

Slowly fading away
You’re lost and so afraid
Where is the hope in a world so cold
Looking for a distant light
Someone who can save a life
Living in fear that no one will hear your cry
Can you save me now

I am with you
I will carry you through it all
I won’t leave you, I will catch you
When you feel like letting go
‘Cause you’re not, you’re not alone

Your heart is full of broken dreams
Just a fading memory
And everything’s gone, but the pain carries on
Lost in the rain again
When will it ever end
The arms of relief seem so out of reach
But I, I am here

And I will be your hope
When you feel like it’s over
And I will pick you up
When your whole world shatters
And when you’re finally in my arms
You’ll look up and see, love has a face

And I will be your hope
(You’re not alone)
And I will pick you up
And I will be your hope
And I will be your hope

Slowly fading away
You’re lost and so afraid
Where is the hope in a world so cold

When I rededicated my life to the Lord in 1988, this was my main reason for grabbing a hold of Him. I was falling and He picked me up!

In July of 1988, I was 28 years old and I was working at a county agency for the elderly as the secretary - bookkeeper - activity director - and the director in the absence of the director. I was dating a model that was 7 years younger than me. I ran around in skirts, hose, and high heels and I looked as though I had it all to the world, but I was dying inside. I’d just been arrested for selling LSD and I knew that I was headed for prison. To me, this was the final blow. I’d had it! My heart broke wide open! I was going over the edge and had literally decided to have myself committed! And God reached down and picked me up!

I’ve heard, time after time, people preaching fire and brimstone. That may work for some, but it didn’t ever work for me. People condemned my ways and told me that I needed to repent, but all that did was give me more reason to hate myself and shoved me further and further down. That gave me all the reason in the world for my various suicide attempts. I thought I was no good and worth nothing! Every time I heard this preached on the radio, TV or etc… it heaped more shame, more guilt, more depression upon me.

But God came to me and pulled me up. He lifted me out of the muck and the mire and showed me His love. He wasn’t condemning, He was loving! And, I started to understand His love more through His word. I sat at my desk at work each day with tears running down my face but my Bible lay on my desk and I read His words:

Psalm 27:1,14
“The Lord is my light and my salvation;
Whom shall I fear?
The Lord is the strength of my life;
Of whom shall I be afraid?...


(http://www.biblegateway.com/passage/?search=Psalm%2027&version=NKJV)


…Wait on the LORD;
Be of good courage,
And He shall strengthen your heart;
Wait, I say, on the LORD!”


And I could go on!

Just a couple of months ago I found a Bible verse that struck me. I know I’ve read it time and again before. This is why His Bible is called the living word. I read it over and over again and sometimes it takes even years before I see a certain verse. He knows when my heart will be open to it and it’s like He highlights it when it will truly touch my heart. I’ve learned this so many times over in this almost 23 years of my daily walks with Him that I continue to ponder His word on a daily basis. This verse was very special and continues to have a special place in my heart:

Romans 2:4
“Or do you despise the riches of His goodness, forbearance, and longsuffering, not knowing that the goodness of God leads you to repentance?”

And, I started praying for others differently; for them to see His goodness. For others to find His love as I did. And, I realized my true passion is just that, to share His love with others so that they may find what He has shown me. That their aching hearts may be comforted by the love of our magnificent Father.

2 Corinthians 1:4
“who comforts us in all our tribulation, that we may be able to comfort those who are in any trouble, with the comfort with which we ourselves are comforted by God.”

And, I continue to hear those words going through my mind as if He was saying them to me Himself “I am with you. I will carry you through it all. I won’t leave you, I will catch you when you feel like letting go. ‘Cause you’re not, you’re not alone.”

And that is also why when I saw this photo it became one of my very favorites. I have a little card with it on it hanging on my desk in front of me now. I say I am the female version in this painting by an unknown artist:

May God bless you through my writing. If He has especially touched you in any way, please leave a comment below. Your comments are so very encouraging to me to help me to keep writing. I pray you will keep coming back. I fully believe that my writing is by the inspiration of the Holy Spirit so if I am writing, there is someone that needs to read it! Maybe it’s you? Also, please be sure to share any questions you might have with me and if you would like to keep them personal (just between you and me) please don’t hesitate to e-mail me at juliana.pace@gmail.com. If I don’t know how to answer you, I will may every attempt to refer you to someone for more information. Thanks and may God bless all your days!

My Momma's Home

My Momma's Home -
9X12 Encaustic Mixed Media Painting
by Juliana

So, here I sit wondering what to write. I prayed and prayed as this is my first time writing since my mother was promoted to glory on January 12th, 2011. I know, without the shadow of a doubt that my mother is now celebrating eternal life with not only our most precious Father God & Jesus but also with my Dad, Grandpa, and etc… from our family who have previously been promoted to glory. But my life, for nearly 10 years since my dad was promoted to glory 10/16/2001, seemed to vastly revolve around organizing care for my elderly/disabled mother (87 years old). After 10 years one most definitely becomes accustomed to that way of life and I seemingly became dumbfounded feeling like I was supposed to be doing things that I could no longer do. I visited my mom on Sunday afternoon for months on end and Sunday afternoons became rather daunting to me. I felt lost in some way, needing some time to let it all soak in and become accustomed to a different way of life.



The Sunday following my mother’s promotion, I ended up down in front kneeling on the steps to the stage in church in tears. Two people came to pray for me and I heard “You have turned your back on her for a moment” and I had to stop her from praying to let her know that my tears were far from tears of sadness. They were tears of joy & thanksgiving in knowing that He was with me through it all.

My mom had been my very closest girlfriend for more than 20 years and she spent the last couple of months in the most severe pain that I’d seen. Her promotion was actually a major answer to my prayers. I am so very thankful to have such a blessed assurance of heaven. Such assurance that I had prayed for the Lord to take her home but with always knowing that my heart was succumbing to His Holy, most perfect will. I knew that He would not let either of us have any more than we could handle. As I sat in her room on 1/9, just 3 days prior to her promotion, I prayed for her, stroking her back and saw in her eyes what I had thought would be a loss of communication but we knew. It was like we saw inside the “see ya later”. And that was the last time that we saw each other in this world! My next and final glimpse was that day in church as the Lord gave me a vision in my mind’s eye of my dad, my mom, and I holding hands and dancing in a circle in heaven….a prize to hold onto until my eventual promotion in God’s time!

In conclusion, I awoke this morning with this song going through my head over and over: “Not Alone” by Red off their newest album “Until We Have Faces”. It’s a true must listen!