He is making perfect sense out of a perfectly senseless, messed up life!

Wednesday, February 16, 2011

My Momma's Home

My Momma's Home -
9X12 Encaustic Mixed Media Painting
by Juliana
So, here I sit wondering what to write. I prayed and prayed as this is my first time writing since my mother was promoted to glory on January 12th, 2011. I know, without the shadow of a doubt that my mother is now celebrating eternal life with not only our most precious Father God & Jesus but also with my Dad, Grandpa, and etc… from our family who have previously been promoted to glory. But my life, for nearly 10 years since my dad was promoted to glory 10/16/2001, seemed to vastly revolve around organizing care for my elderly/disabled mother (87 years old). After 10 years one most definitely becomes accustomed to that way of life and I seemingly became dumbfounded feeling like I was supposed to be doing things that I could no longer do. I visited my mom on Sunday afternoon for months on end and Sunday afternoons became rather daunting to me. I felt lost in some way, needing some time to let it all soak in and become accustomed to a different way of life.

The Sunday following my mother’s promotion, I ended up down in front kneeling on the steps to the stage in church in tears. Two people came to pray for me and I heard “You have turned your back on her for a moment” and I had to stop her from praying to let her know that my tears were far from tears of sadness. They were tears of joy & thanksgiving in knowing that He was with me through it all.

My mom had been my very closest girlfriend for more than 20 years and she spent the last couple of months in the most severe pain that I’d seen. Her promotion was actually a major answer to my prayers. I am so very thankful to have such a blessed assurance of heaven. Such assurance that I had prayed for the Lord to take her home but with always knowing that my heart was succumbing to His Holy, most perfect will. I knew that He would not let either of us have any more than we could handle. As I sat in her room on 1/9, just 3 days prior to her promotion, I prayed for her, stroking her back and saw in her eyes what I had thought would be a loss of communication but we knew. It was like we saw inside the “see ya later”. And that was the last time that we saw each other in this world! My next and final glimpse was that day in church as the Lord gave me a vision in my mind’s eye of my dad, my mom, and I holding hands and dancing in a circle in heaven….a prize to hold onto until my eventual promotion in God’s time!

In conclusion, I awoke this morning with this song going through my head over and over: “Not Alone” by Red off their newest album “Until We Have Faces”. It’s a true must listen!