He is making perfect sense out of a perfectly senseless, messed up life!

Thursday, December 8, 2011

Forgetting the Past – God’s Ominous Power

           *Philippians 3:13 “Brethren, I do not count myself to have apprehended; but one thing I do, forgetting those things which are behind and reaching forward to those things which are ahead,”  and
        *Philippians 4:8  “Finally, brethren, whatever things are true, whatever things are noble, whatever things are just, whatever things are pure, whatever things are lovely, whatever things are of good report, if there is any virtue and if there is anything praiseworthy—meditate on these things.”
I haven’t written for some time so I’ve been thinking and praying.  During this time of year there are many memories, some good and some bad.  So many countless memories God has healed.  I’ve been told time and again that it seemed that I brought up the past too much as if I wasn’t forgetting and moving on.  But, I don’t believe that is exactly what this scripture means.  How many of you fondly remember times past?  I believe memories of many things are good for our hearts.  It’s the sting of bad memories that we need to forget.  That is where the healing comes into place.  If, while remembering, we have an awful time with tears, resentment, guilt and on and on, then this is where we should go to our Father in heaven and ask Him how these memories may be healed.  I have written through some while in prayer.  I have just thought through some while in prayer and the sting never returned.  And, I have started to remember awful things from my past that He just completely removed all of the hurt and pain from without me even having to work through them. 
        *1 Corinthians 10:13 “No temptation has overtaken you except such as is common to man; but God is faithful, who will not allow you to be tempted beyond what you are able, but with the temptation will also make the way of escape, that you may be able to bear it.”
Many of my memories come to mind to share from my past prison experience from 1988-90.  I’ve had friends come to me with worrisome looks regarding this.  But God healed any and all of the sting from these memories years upon years ago.  The memories that are noble, just, pure, lovely, and etc… from this experience are too numerous to count.  I’m learning through not only my experience but also the experiences of others (namely a cousin who was stationed with her husband in the service in Saudi Arabia) that the work of the Holy Spirit as comforter, teacher and friend seems so much more profound in times of absolute need.  Prison is a place where God became more real to me than any of you are or even my husband, mother, father, brothers.  He walked with me and talked with me.  I sat on my bunk and learned from Him as if He sat beside me in the flesh.
         *Philippians 4:19  “And my God shall supply all your need according to His riches in glory by Christ Jesus.”
And people slight God.  And I slighted God.  I was reluctant to believe in His power.  I can honestly say that I never doubted His existence.   I doubted His power!  Until prison I just didn’t get His power and His love shown to me through His willingness to provide for ALL OF MY NEEDS no matter what those needs are. 
We look in our own wisdom and give Him limits but by His wisdom and knowledge He created us and this entire world.
        *Proverbs 3: 19, 20 “By wisdom the Lord founded the earth;
by understanding He created the heavens.  By His knowledge the deep fountains of the earth burst forth, and the dew settles beneath the night sky.”

By His wisdom/knowledge He is able to do anything!  I could go on and on about prison and all of the ways He blessed me in there.  But, one instance that stands out amongst so many is a time in 1989 when the sun hadn’t shown for days, weeks, well it had been probably 3 weeks (if you know Ohio, you’d understand).  I was walking to the cafeteria, talking to the Lord in my mind about this fact.  I told Him that I’d just love to see the sunshine.  Right at that moment, the clouds parted and the sun shone down on me, just me.  I had two friends with me at that point that watched it happen.  Why would I want to forget that?  What good would be done by me forgetting that?  But, what good may be done by me remembering that?  I remember how willing my Papa was to provide for my needs and even some of my wants because He is my Papa.
        *Matthew 7:11  “If you then, being evil, know how to give good gifts to your children, how much more will your Father who is in heaven give good things to those who ask Him!” 
Yesterday, I remembered and looked for a used CD to purchase called “Our Hymns”.  A song came to mind from it that comforted my heart so much during this time of need.  My folks had send me a walkman and periodically send some cassette tapes.  I remember lying on that top bunk listening to that cassette tape and in the comfort of the Holy Spirit I was (in my mind’s eye) transported out the window onto the roof and free within my spirit.  It was like that prison disappeared!
And, when I am sitting here at my computer, disabled by the world, alone in this computer room/studio for the umpteenth hour this week I can remember those times and He brings His peace once again. 

*John 14:27  “Peace I leave with you, My peace I give to you; not as the world gives do I give to you. Let not your heart be troubled, neither let it be afraid.”

And through this PAST experience, I KNOW that if I could find His peace in that situation, that I or anyone can find His peace any time.  We need to work with our Father to gain healing from past experiences so we may forget them.  But to learn from them, remembering those things that help us to meditate on things that are pure, lovely, etc...

*2 Corinthians 12:10 “Therefore I take pleasure in infirmities, in reproaches, in needs, in persecutions, in distresses, for Christ’s sake. For when I am weak, then I am strong.”

       If any of you ever have any questions, concerns, or just need someone to talk to please e-mail me at juliana.pace@gmail.com.

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