I heard the words “get up” and I did. Soon I was inspired to write. I was so very inspired by the way He so often speaks to me in my dreams in one way, shape or form. I’ve shared with friends that almost daily I see Him in my mind’s eye either directly waking me up or sitting by my bed watching for me to open my eyes. You might think I’m nuts, but you’ll know you’re not if it happens to you. I believe this is a direct answer to my prayers way back when I was in prison in the late 80’s. I was so scared of falling back into that awful life where I lived in the dark, ignoring Him!
I’d found LOVE as it ONLY exists in Him and I never wanted to lose that again. So, I prayed and asked Him to bring me reminders by His Holy Spirit so that I would not slip away. And, I awake remembering He was there more nights than I awake feeling like I didn’t even dream or just nonsense dreams. AND…
I have been dreaming similarly since I was saved in 1973 at 13 years old. I wandered for another 15 years with no clue where I was supposed to go or what I was supposed to do, living in deep, dark places. He showed me in recent years that is was how He helped to keep me alive. I lived in Dejavue moments due to dreaming all the many apartments I moved to (30 some in just 11 years).
I learned in so many ways how the 70’s, my teen years, were basically a major nightmare of physical, verbal, mental, and emotional abuse; suicide attempts; severe accidents where I broke my back along with numerous others but He sent me an angel in my psychologist who I saw from 1979-1988 (plus a few times with my step son in the 2000’s). I stayed intoxicated due to self-medicating yet this did help to keep me alive even though those years were very unproductive in so many ways! I internalized everything. I’d get upset with someone, stuff the feelings, and go get high. Did I ever think of the consequences? Of course not, people put me down for so many years that I thought I deserved any negatively that I ever got.
By the time that I was arrested in 1988 for selling LSD, I thought I was the scum of the earth. I thought ‘well, the world is letting me know one final time that I’m worthless and they’ll throw me away in prison.’ And until just a few years ago I had no idea how valuable I was to God and how He’d been there with me all along! I had pushed aside much of my past, pushed it back into my memory to where I thought it was all my fault that I acted the way that I did and I remembered very little good that I ever did.
*Deuteronomy 31:6 “Be strong and of good courage, do not fear nor be afraid of them; for the Lord your God, He is the One who goes with you. He will not leave you nor forsake you.”
When I was arrested in 1988 I fell into a deep, deep depression. There wasn’t a day that I didn’t cry at my desk at work (I was fully functioning in a white collar world so no one really knew.) I was scared to death of prison, it was my bottom, so I figured I’d just put myself away. I figured I could not even commit suicide right since I’d attempted 4 times but never made it fully. I was actually headed out the door from work to my psychologist’s office to be put away when my co-conspirator and his mother showed up at my work to stop me. I now know how God worked through them. After all, it was she that had read the Bible to me over the phone when I sat at my kitchen table in my underwear unable to shower. She started the ball rolling and if you want to read more, then you’ll have to get a copy of my book (Beyond to Better Things by Tricia Marie) that is only available through August, 2015 when my contract runs out. (I am looking into possibly e-publishing or putting it on Kindle, etc…).
And, He has been FAITHFUL to keep me reminded of Him always being here for this full 26+ years. Daily I live in His presence!
*1 John 5:14-15 “Now this is the confidence that we have in Him, that if we ask anything according to His will, He hears us. 15 And if we know that He hears us, whatever we ask, we know that we have the petitions that we have asked of Him.
*Philippians 4:19 “And my God shall supply all your need according to His riches in glory by Christ Jesus.”
If you or someone you knows is currently in the condition that I was previous to finding Jesus as my Lord and Savior and Constant Companion then please reach out to Him, yourself and/or share this with that friend. He is there anxiously awaiting for you to let Him be there for you and you will find what I did those 26+ years ago:
*John 14:27 *Peace I leave with you, My peace I give to you; not as the world gives do I give to you. Let not your heart be troubled, neither let it be afraid.”
And, not long ago I looked up this passage in The Message Bible and I just loved it. No wonder this verse has been my favorite since I rededicated my life to the Lord!
*John 14:25-27 “I’m telling you these things while I’m still living with you. The Friend, the Holy Spirit whom the Father will send at my request, will make everything plain to you. He will remind you of all the things I have told you. I’m leaving you well and whole. That’s my parting gift to you. Peace. I don’t leave you the way you’re used to being left—feeling abandoned, bereft. So don’t be upset. Don’t be distraught.”
God may not give everyone such dreams as He gave to me, but He will provide for all of your needs as an individual, which means if you need it, He will provide it.
*Philippians 4:19 "And my God shall supply all your need according to His riches in glory by Christ Jesus."
If you’d like to turn to Him now, please say the following prayer, truly meaning it in your heart:
I want to know more of You. I want to turn away from this life that is just hurting and confusing me and come into a life with You. I believe that You died for my sins and want to live in a relationship with me forever! Show me Who You are and how I may live with You at the helm of my life!
In Jesus’ name,
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May God bless you through my writing. If He has especially touched you in any way, please leave a comment below. Your comments are so very encouraging to me to help me to keep writing. Also, click on the “Uptweet” button on the above right and share! I pray you will keep coming back. I fully believe that my writing is by the inspiration of the Holy Spirit so if I am writing, there is someone that needs to read it! Maybe it’s you? Also, please be sure to share any questions you might have with me and if you would like to keep them personal (just between you and me) please don’t hesitate to e-mail me at firstname.lastname@example.org. If I don’t know how to answer you, I will may every attempt to refer you to someone for more information. Thanks and may God bless all your days!